Tuesday, September 9, 2008

The Mistress...

The Coast Guard calls this boat the Alex Haley, I prefer to call her the mistress. The mistress that is going to be taking the other half of me away for far longer than I would like.  I am not really sure why I am having such a hard time with him leaving for the next 8 weeks. He's left for far longer than this before but it was also many years, two kids and one very needy dog lighter.  Maybe it has to do with my health issues? Maybe the older I get, the more I realize that we aren't invisible, like we once thought we were. There are real dangers out there that could change our future in a heart beat. I guess the danger of Dale's job hit home with the crew that just lost their lives- not even on a deployment, but just doing routine training. All of those men had wives, and children that expected them to come home.  As much as I feel and cry for those women who in a moment had their world flipped upside down I can't help but be selfishly thankful it wasn't Dale, it wasn't his crew. Which got me thinking- the security of him coming safely home from this deployment isn't solid. And it reminded me how little control I have over not just this upcoming deployment, but day to day life. Oh, how I have been miserably failing at letting go and letting God. 

2 comments:

  1. I can't even imagine that long. I will pray for you and your kids as well as your Hubby while you are apart. It isn't even fun being apart for a few weeks like it will be before I see my Hubby again and he's not even in the military or anything. Still... it is hard on the kids. My little girl has really been emotional since my Hubby left to California. I am trying to keep busy with packing etc... and remembering to have a little bit of fun in between. I hope you will too !! Hugs and prayers, Your friend, Mica

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  2. I have a "Mistress" in my life too, only her name is "Munro". I have been feeling the exact same range of emotions as you have over the past few days. That helo crash really shook me up, and my husband doesn't even come close to a helo on a daily basis, let alone ride in one. I haven't had much experience with aviation in the past, because Jake's career has always been boats, but being here in Kodiak has given me some perspective with the Coast Guard, and now I actually have friends and acquaintences who do those exact jobs as those the perished in HI. I have cried so many times over the past few days...and not just over that. :P This life is rough, what with dealing with deployments as we do, health concerns, the struggles of living here in Kodiak, kids, school, running a household...I could go on and on. What gets me through is my faith that God has put me here for a reason and trying to focus on and find those reasons and learn the lessons that he wants me to learn from this experience. Everything happens for a reason and what we go through makes us stronger. I think he put you guys across the hall from us so that we can help each other and support each other through these next crazy few years and maybe get a laugh or two out of it along the way. :) I'm here for ya! Just knock any time! :)

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